


We can never go back, but maybe we can move forward

by Rayj4ck



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, She-Ra: Princess Of Power
Genre: F/F, I needed a redemption fic, If you can't tell, TW: minor character suicide, so i wrote my own, this is just a way for me to make Catra talk about her feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-22
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-08-27 12:08:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16702270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rayj4ck/pseuds/Rayj4ck
Summary: Catra gets to meet all of Adora’s friends.





	1. Ghost's Shadow

They were in the middle of a strategy meeting when it happened. Glimmer was mid-declaration of joy that her plan had been approved when the guard burst through the door. “Your Majesty! There’s…people here to see you.”  
“We’re in the middle of something at the moment,” Queen Angella said, gesturing to the holographic battlefield in front of her.  
“It’s urgent. You had better come and see for yourself, your Majesty.” Narrowing her eyes, the Queen walked around the table and followed the guard to the front gate. Adora, Bow and the princesses weren’t far behind. When they arrived at the gate, Adora’s mouth fell open in shock. It looked like every guard along the front of the wall was there, pointing their spears at-

  
“Entrapta!” Bow cried, rushing through the guards and throwing himself onto her in a moderately awkward hug. “We thought you were dead!”   
Entrapta, who was slowly shying away from the embrace, lit up. “Of course! That’s why you left!” Her expression became confused. “But I didn’t die.”  
“I saw the fire eat you alive!”  
“Oh! Emily shielded me with her fireproof casing.” Entrapta said, looking behind her. Emily waved one of her legs.   
Adora, while also happy Entrapta was alive, barely heard any of this. There, looking down at the ground like it was about to fall out from under her, was Catra.

  
-

   
Catra sighed and rattled the chains around her wrists for amusement.  _I guess I shouldn’t really expect a presidential welcome. I did make a lot of attempts to destroy this castle._  They had put her in a prison cell, which was better than killing her on sight, which is what she had expected them to do. Which is what the Horde would have done. Locking her in this cell had given Catra ample time to stew in her own thoughts. There was a lot there, the deafening voice of Shadow Weaver asking her if she had lost her mind was a fun new one. But of course, it all circled back to Adora. Catra had made an active effort to avoid looking at her, but she could still feel her eyes on her like spotlights as she was walked across the bridge to the main castle. She hadn’t moved, or said a word. She had just stared.  
Catra couldn’t tell if that was better or worse than the alternative. 

  
The unmistakable sound of magic pulled her out of her thoughts. Sitting across from her in a chair that wasn’t there before was one of Adora’s new friends. The shiny, teleporting one.   
“Oh please. They sent you to interrogate me?” She asked, leaning as far forward as the chains would allow. “You look like a cupcake. And I’ve seen exactly two in my entire life.” Glimmer growled through her teeth and held up a sparkling hand, fist clenched. Despite her cocky words, Catra kept her eyes on that hand. She still had memories of the girl launching her back fifty feet through the air from one particular fight they had. Glimmer leaned in close and said “Listen to me, Catra. I don’t know what kind of trick this is, but WHEN you hurt Adora,” she left the words hanging, choosing to drop her hand to Catra’s arms. Catra winced as she felt the heat coming from the glow. _Well, that’s a new one._  Standing from the chair, the princess was about to teleport away when Catra called “Wait!” Glimmer looked back to her, and Catra continued “What happened to Scorpia and Entrapta?” Glimmer held her gaze for a second, before turning away. “Scorpia is in an interrogation cell. Entrapta is…complicated.” Without leaving time to answer, she teleported away.

  
-

  
The other one came down later. Catra would have guessed about an hour, no more than two, before the one who always had his stomach out turned the corner.   
“Oh great, your turn now?” Catra said, standing up from the floor and focusing on the man. “Here to give me the ‘Hurt my friend and I’ll punch your teeth out’ talk too?”  
“No!” Bow shouted indignantly. “I…am here to…”  
Catra waited.  
“Fine, yes I was here to give you the speech!” Bow let out after a truly painful amount of excuses.  
“Uh-huh. Look, this isn’t a trick. I’m here. Surrendering.” Catra said, choking out the last word, pushing through years of training. She rattled the chains around her wrists for extra effect.  
“If you’re not-”  
“Yeah, yeah. I know. ‘Suffering on me and my family for years to come.”  
“Well, good!” Bow said, turning and marching back out.

  
-

  
Catra was on the 843rd brick when the next one came along. This time it was the flower lady.  
“I’m so glad you decided to join us!” She cheered.  
“Look, I al- wait, what?”  
“You’re here to join us right?”  
“Well, sort of. I’m definitely not going back to the Horde.”  
“Excellent!” Perfuma waved her hand and a flower crown appeared on Catra’s head.  
“I just, everyone else that’s come down here has given me the Adora protection speech. I wasn’t expecting such a…joyful tone.”  
“I know it can be gloomy in here, so I was hoping to lighten the mood!” She said, summoning(?) a whole variety of flowers out of thin air. “Besides,” she continued, her eyes getting a faraway look in them, “as you said, you know what happens if you hurt Adora.” Catra looked down and saw that the flowers in her hands had all grown thorns that were dripping some kind of fluid. She also noticed the flower crown on her forehead getting tighter. Much tighter.  
“Ow ow ow ow ow ow.” She hissed as she tried fruitlessly to tug it off. Perfuma looked up and saw what was happening and gasped. “I’m so sorry!” she said, waving a hand. The flower crown wilted off her head, and Catra released a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She rubbed along where the crown was and felt an indentation on the skin that would definitely bruise. When she looked back, Perfuma was gone.

  
-

  
Mermista stared at Catra.   
Catra stared at Mermista.  
…  
“Nope. Don’t want to.” Mermista said out of the blue, turning and walking back down the corridor.  
“Finally, someone I can agree with.” Catra muttered under her breath.

  
-

  
Adora slowly descended the stairs to the dungeon, trying to sort out her thoughts. She really didn’t think she should be doing this. Not only did Queen Angella order Catra be left alone for six hours while she “Sorted everything out,” but Adora was still not sure where she and Catra stood. But she knew she had to talk to her, so Adora was going to do what Adora did best. Throw herself into it and pray to god she could get back out again. When she got to the final set of stairs,s she was surprised to see all of her friends standing at the bottom, peeking around the corridor. “What’re you all doing?” she asked, startling them all. Whipping around, Glimmer stuttered out “We…uh…we were-” before an enraged shout echoed down the hallway, followed by an unmistakably girly scream. “Oh no,” Adora whispered before rounding the corner. Catra had ripped the loop off the wall her chains were threaded through, and she currently had Sea Hawk by the collar, shaking him back and forth. “NO MORE SINGING!” She screamed in his face. Racing across the hallway, Adora grabbed Catra’s claws and pried them off. “Ok. Ok. Ok. He’s done with the singing.” Turning to Sea Hawk, she started with the obvious. “What the frozen Hell were you doing?”  
“Well everyone else got a turn.” He replied, and Adora could hear someone (probably Glimmer) smack their own forehead from around the corner. “Oh did they now?” Adora asked, and all of the other Princesses and Bow filed out.  
“That’s not true,” Frosta said. For a second, Glimmer looked hopeful, before Frosta followed up with “I was going to go after Sea Hawk.”

  
Adora and Catra stared at the group with eerily similar faces of disbelief. “Well,” Adora said, recovering first. “We’re changing the order. Sea Hawk is done, and I’M up now.” Adora said, nudging Sea Hawk toward the group. “And I’m taking it IN PRIVATE.” The rest of the gang shuffled back up the stairs, and Adora tried to ignore the fact that they looked like scolded puppies. Turning to the cell, she saw Catra’s eyes quickly dart away from her. Still not looking, she walked back to the back wall of the cell and sat down on the floor. Adora sighed, steeling herself for the probably rough conversation ahead. Pulling the cell key from her pocket, she unlocked the door, stepped in, locked it behind her, then unsheathed her sword and used it to hang the key across the hall.  
“Smart.” Catra couldn’t stop herself from commenting, before quickly turning away again.  
“Thanks.” Adora answered. Walking over, she sat down against the wall with Catra. “I see you’ve been doing your training.” She said, glancing up to the spot on the wall where the chains had been previously anchored. Catra didn’t respond.   
Sighing once again, she continued with “Alright, not up for small talk today. Fair enough.” Looking back out into the hallway, to the key hanging out of reach, she got right to the point. “What did it? After a solid year of begging to no avail, what changed your mind now?”  
“What makes you so sure I did?” Catra spat back. “Maybe this is all a trick.”  
“To what end?” Adora responded. “We separated your team, you gained no extra knowledge on the way here from the front gate, and you have no back-up coming that we haven’t fought and defeated already. The only way this makes sense as a double cross is a suicide mission or the long game. And we both know you would never pick a suicide mission, and the Horde would never have the patience for the long game.”  
“…Well, you were Force Captain for a reason.”  
“Heh. Barely.” Adora looked back to Catra. “So again, why?”  
Catra swallowed, a lump in her throat forming, like a dam keeping all her words in.  _Just start. Then she won’t let you stop, and you can go from there. Just start._

  
“It was never enough.”  
“Hm?”  
“Whenever I did something, it was never enough. When I completed a drill, it was ‘Why didn’t you fight harder?’ and if I came up with a plan, it was ‘Why didn’t you use fewer troops?’ and if I won battles, it was ‘Why didn’t you win it faster?’ And I always knew what they all meant. Sure, it wasn’t in their words, but it was in their voices. ‘Adora could have fought harder. Adora could have used less. Adora could have won faster.” Catra let out a mirthless chuckle. “You had defected to the enemy side, and I was still living under your shadow.” Catra turned her head away. “I figured if I was going to be living in a shadow, I would rather it be your’s than your ghosts’.”  
Adora gazed at Catra for a few seconds, before sliding along the floor until their sides were touching. Putting an arm around Catra’s shoulders she started to scratch behind one of Catra’s ears, just like she did years ago, whenever they had a long day of training. Or, more often, if Catra had strayed into Shadow Weaver’s warpath once again. She had always done this to sooth the other woman, and she would be damned if Catra didn’t melt right back into it. “You won’t be living under my shadow. Not here. That’s not how it works in the Rebellion.”  
Catra snorted. “Yeah right.” but she leaned her head against Adora’s shoulder all the same.  
“No really!” Adora said, leaning her head on Catra’s. “It’s so different from the Horde. It’s so much better. The Horde…they aren’t just evil to the Rebels.”  
“Yeah well, we’ll see about that.” Catra exhaled, barely awake now.  
“You will. You might have to spend some time in this cell, and it may take everyone some time to warm up to you,  but you’ll see.”  
Catra didn’t reply, already out cold.   
Adora grinned down at her slumbering form, and gave her a soft kiss on the temple before slowly extracting her arm. Sliding off her jacket, she left it over Catra’s body for a blanket (and tried not to squeal when Catra wrapped it around herself in her sleep.) before unhooking the key and letting herself out of the cell. She was sure tomorrow would be a long day of actual, official interrogations. So for now, Catra could rest.   
She’s earned it.


	2. Verdict

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You thought I was done? Well so did I. But a few nice comments paired with a couple more ideas bouncing around leads to a second chapter. Although that means this story is off the rails now. No schedule. No definitive endpoint. Total mess.

Finally. The day was finally here. After a long, unpleasant interrogation lasting a whole week, at a few points in which the Queen herself had come to question her (where at one point, Catra had straight up said “Look your shininess, I’m pretty sure the things I know are all that’s keeping me alive. So forgive me for not spilling it all for you day one.” Catra was pretty sure that if the Queen wasn’t around to physically restrain her, Glimmer would have jumped over the table and gone for her throat right then and there.), the sentencing day had finally come. It was also the first time she had seen Entrapta and Scorpia since they got here. Entrapta was wearing heavy cuffs that covered her whole hand, and a special type of restraints around her hair braids. Catra was 95 percent sure she could escape anyway. Scorpia had even heavier cuffs on, extending up her entire forearm, as well as leg chains and a cover over her pointed tail. She could have easily snapped through the leg bindings and probably gotten through the cuffs in a few good swings. Catra, it seemed, was the only one properly restrained. She felt a little smug they had gone all out for her, giving her a full body stasis pad. She wiggled around a little more, to see if it was still running at full power. And it was, making her feel like she was trapped in an invisible cast of her body. As Catra was pushed along down the aisle toward the Queen’s throne, Entrapta spied her and exclaimed “Oh I made that!” Catra sighed as the guard exchanged nervous glances. “You really just love making this harder on me then it already is, don’t you?” 

“What do you mean?” Entrapta asked before the guards pushed her forward a few paces, and when they got to the throne, moved her way off to the right, away from all the technology she had no doubt invented. “Ooooh. I GET IT NOW!” She shouted over to Catra, who sighed again and attempted to put her head in her hands.  _ Lesser of two evils. Lesser of two evils.  _ she chanted to herself as her stasis disk was dropped down in front of the Queen. 

“Catra, Scorpia, and Entrapta. After a week of gathering information,”  _ interrogating  _ “I have reached my decision.” 

“Wait, just you? Don’t we get, like, a trial by our peers?” Catra interrupted. 

“Do you want one?” Queen Angella asked her cooly. Looking around the room, Catra saw the looks on everyone’s faces that ranged from mild interest (Mermista) to barely contained hostility (Glimmer), and reconsidered. “Can I have a trial by Adora?” Adora, standing between her and Scorpia, couldn’t stop a quiet snort from escaping her nose, but her face remained as serious as ever.

“No. Now, as I was saying, I have reached my decision. You defected willingly, which removes the possibility of execution.” Catra tried not to think too hard about that sentence. “However, over the past year, you have caused severe damage and threat to my people. As such, you have been sentenced...to…” the Queen trailed off, staring out over Catra’s head. 

Catra narrowed her eyes in confusion. “What, am I supposed to ask wha-” was as far as she got before the doors blew in behind her and the hall descended into chaos. Adora grabbed Catra and Scorpia and dragged them behind one of the columns off to the side as blasters began firing down the aisle. 

“TRAITORS!” Someone screamed, and Adora looked at Catra. “Was that Lonnie?” Catra rolled her eyes. “Yes it was. She hasn’t gotten any easier to deal with.” Before Adora could stop her, Scorpia poked her head around the corner. “Hi Lonnie!” Adora quickly dragged her back as a laser burned past her ear and a furious howl followed shortly after. “Maybe we don’t do that,” Adora said, and Scorpia nodded back.

“How did they get in here?” The Queen shouted over the noise. 

“Maybe it’s because you removed all of your strongest fighters from defending the perimeter and put them all in this room!” Catra shouted back. “You can’t expect your guards to beat these nerds! They don’t even have names!” 

“Of course our guards have names!” Glimmer shouted at her from behind a neighboring column. 

“Coulda fooled me,” Catra muttered to herself before raising her voice. “Hey, which traitors are you here for exactly?” 

“I’ll kill you Catra!”

“Got it,” Catra called back. Shifting her eyes to Adora, she asked “Hey Adora. Could you maybe let me go so I can keep myself from getting shot in the face?”

“Don’t you dare!” Glimmer shouted.

Adora thought hard, and came up with her answer. “What was going to be your verdict, your Majesty?” 

“Really? Now?” 

“Yes now!”

“I was GOING to say five years imprisoned, with parole offered based on aid against the Horde!”

“Excellent!” Adora replied, before pushing a button on the stasis pad and freeing Catra. “You can start now. Aid us in removing the Horde from this castle.” 

-

“Holy crap,” Catra sighed as she slumped down onto the floor. “That was incredibly exhausting. Why do your floors have to be so hard?” 

“You could invest in a pair of shoes you know.” Glimmer shot back, although most of the malice in her voice was replaced by exhaustion as well. 

“You try finding boots that don’t get shredded from the inside out with claws like mine.”

“Girls, girls. You’re both pretty.” Adora dropped down between the two. “Can we save this conversation for another day though? I’m ready for a bath and a ten-hour nap.”

“A huh?” Catra asked.

“It’s like a shower, but you’re laying down and do like one-eighth of the work.”

“Hhhmm. Don’t know. We’ll see.”

The invaders had been chased out of the castle easily enough, but they had chased them out into four entire platoons of well-armed soldiers. And then that became a whole afternoon. 

“Not so fast.” stated a commanding voice from their side. Turning, Queen Angella was looking down at the three of them. 

“How does she look like that?” Catra stage-whispered to Adora (and a lesser extent Glimmer). “We just fought a five-hour battle and she looks like she just got finished putting on her make-up. What gives?”

“Flattery will get you nowhere, Catra.” The Queen cut in, and Catra wasn’t sure how to interpret the sound of her name in the Queen’s mouth. “You’re still on trial.” 

“STILL?”

“Yes, still.” The Queen responded with the note of finality only raising a young, rebellious Glimmer could have taught her. Catra clamped her mouth shut. 

“Your sentence remains the same. However, your assistance in today’s battle has earned you a few...luxuries. Like a better bed. And a supervised bath.” 

“I’ll take it.” Catra agreed, before slowly getting to her feet. “Literally. I’ll take it right now. Can so- Wait what about supervised?”

“Well, we can’t leave you alone for too long. You are still a prisoner.”

“Someone is going to watch me bathe?”

“Well I thought you and Adora had-”

“ADORA?”

“ME?”

“Well, if you would prefer I could ask Mermista or Perfuma to-”

“No! No thank you!” Catra, already flushed, turned a deep shade of crimson and waved her hands in front of her face. 

“Excellent. Now, I recommend you wash up and get some rest. You had a big day today.” With that, Queen Angella flew away. The pair turned to the rest of the gang, who all got the hell out of there as soon as possible. Glimmer teleported away, Bow hitching a ride. Frosta and Perfuma rode waves of plants or ice respectively, Mermista jumped into the ocean, dragging Sea Hawk with her. 

“Sorry boss!” Scorpia called before dead sprint running. Entrapta hopped on top of Emily and gave the pair a smile and wave before riding away. Soon it was just the two of them. 

“So…”


	3. Poet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The angst doesn't come from the story, it comes from you not seeing the bath scene.

“How could you not like baths?” Adora asked as they turned the corner back down to Catra’s cell. “They’re like the ultimate excuse to be lazy. You love being lazy!”

“I don’t know Adora! Why don’t you like celery?”

“I don’t know, I just don’t.”

“Exactly,” Catra said, walking into her cell. Adora followed her in, standing in the doorway. She wouldn’t be long. 

“Well, I guess we’re going to be doing supervised showers then.”

“Speaking of supervised-”

“Yeah yeah, I got it. Not a word. Never happened. Definitely didn’t see that cute birthmark.”

“Hey!” Catra shrieked, going red. “You didn’t tell me you saw that!”

“I didn’t. Goodnight, Catra.” Adora shot her a cheeky grin, then shut and locked the cell door behind her. 

 

-

 

“Is it bad that I’m kind of hoping the Horde will attack soon?” Catra asked, laying on her back on her bed and throwing a ball up against the wall. 

“Yes, yes it is.” Bow answered, flipping a page in his book from the other side of the bars. 

“Well no one told me defecting would be this boring!” Catra exclaimed, hurling the ball with all he strength, watching it bounce back and forth between the walls for a while before catching it again and sighing, all of her anger leaving with her breath. “Can I really not do anything? Knitting? My god I can’t believe I just asked that you have to let me out of here.”

“Not gonna happen. Have you tried poetry?”

“Please just execute me.”

 

-

 

_ What other words can I use for the color blue? _

“Hey Catra!”

“NOTHING!” Catra shouted, shredding her piece of paper and shoving her makeshift pencil under her pillow. “I mean hey.” she recovered, leaping up and leaning against the wall trying to look nonchalant. 

“Time for some military advising,” Adora said as she unlocked the door to Catra’s cell. “Now I can’t make promises, but doing well on this one might get you some higher quality meals. With  _ desserts _ .”

“With what now?”

“Oh just wait until you try them. It’s fantastic.” Adora said as she walked Catra down the halls, not even in handcuffs anymore. Coming to a set of double doors, Adora pushed them open into the familiar sight of Bright Moon’s War Room. The usual crowd was there, all the princesses, Scorpia and Entrapta included, as well as Bow and the Queen. 

“Boss!” Scorpia shouted and picked Catra up in both arms like she was seeing Catra for the first time in years and not days. 

“Not anymore Scorpia. Not really.” Catra said gently, even though she was desperate to get down. 

“Aahh, you’ll always be my boss,” Scorpia answered, before carefully setting Catra back on the ground. 

“Alright,” Catra started, cracking her neck like she was about to enter the ring with an opponent twice her size. “Time to do my job.” She approached the holo-table, examining the troops and tanks spread across the board. “Ok. Ok. You did pretty well for yourselves. But they’re definitely going to bring in an ambush from these woods,” she highlighted a section with a finger “and wipe this infantry unit. After that, you’re losing the numbers game and it’s pretty much over. Come in from the east with some night vision equipped, stealth units and catch the ambush quietly. After that, attack the main forces from both sides and you’re all set.”

“Woah.” Adora gaped, scratching her head. “I would’ve never guessed that.”

“Yeah, after you ducked out Hordak had a force captain meeting for a total strategy overhaul. I saw two people get fired right in front of me.”

“Why is that a big deal?” Perfuma spoke up from her spot. Adora, Catra and Scorpia all winced and shot each other uneasy gazes before Adora stepped up to the plate to answer. 

“Getting fired in the Horde isn’t like getting fired here. In the Horde, they literally set you on fire.”

“Oh my lord.”

“Yeah.”

A heavy air settled over the table before Catra spoke up and broke it. “So, what’s this ‘desserts’ thing Adora tells me about?”

 

-

 

Catra was sucking on her third lollipop when the gears began turning in her head. After Adora left, Hordak had revamped his entire army’s strategy. He would obviously do it again eventually now that Catra and crew had left as well. Pretty soon, she would know as little as Adora about the Horde’s plans. Adora had the whole She-Ra thing going for her, so she got to stick around. But why would they bother keeping Catra?

Catra rolled her pencil between her fingers, and couldn’t help but notice how sharp the point was. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, maybe some angst comes from the story. I know this chapter was crazy short, but adding anything more would feel like fluffing it. And the next chapter is kind of its own thing too, so I was uncomfortable adding it to this one.


	4. Worthless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes our friends are the easiest to lie to

“Hey Adora.”

“Oh hey. What’s up Glimmer?” Adora said, looking over her shoulder in her chair to face Glimmer. Being a princess (of power or not) meant just as much paperwork as blade work, although for the “of power” princesses, the paperwork was more field reports and strategy schematics. So Adora spent just as much time at her desk as she did on the mat. 

“Uh, has everything been Ok lately?”

“Oh, yeah!” Adora said, brightening up. “The troops on the Eastern front have actually made a big break recently-”

“That’s, uh, that’s great! But not what I meant.” Glimmer tapped the tips of her fingers against her thumbs as she tried to figure out how to approach the topic. “I mean, personally.”

“Oh?” Adora said, sensing that this conversation was not going to end soon and spinning around in her chair all the way. “Well, I’ve been doing fine lately.” Adora narrowed her eyes. “Whhhyyy?”

“Asdfhef excuse me? Can’t I be curious if one of my best friends is Ok?” Glimmer asked, doing a terrible job of not looking guilty. 

“Glimmeeer.”

“It’s just...I think something is up with Catra, and you’re like the only thing she REALLY cares about so…” Glimmer trailed off, letting Adora fill in the rest.

“Huh? What’s up with Catra?” 

“Well, I went to go visit her earlier and...uh…”

Adora just raised her eyebrows and waited for Glimmer to gather her thoughts.

“She didn’t...insult me as much as she usually does?”

“Aaaand this is a problem?”

“Well it’s not that, it’s just that, you know. She usually gets in a few ‘Sparkles’ or ‘Shimmer’ or talks about that one time I accidentally teleported into a hollowed out log and got stuck for like an hour.”

“Still not seeing the downside.”

“But recently she’s been kind of, I don’t know, depressed? Like today, all she did was stick her tongue out at me and threw a pebble at me.” Glimmer looked to the side. “I thought she cared a little more than that, ya know?”

“Noooot really. But clearly, we have seen in the past that Catra is an expert at hiding her emotions from me at least. I’ll go talk to her later on tonight. Thanks for looking out for her Glimmer.” Adora said, standing from her desk and wrapping Glimmer in a tight hug. “I know you didn’t always like her.”

“Yeah, well. Don’t ever tell her, but I’m beginning to see why you always insisted she should be spared.” Glimmer answered, returning the hug. 

 

-

 

“Surprise visit!” Adora shouted as she walked down the stairs, making sure Catra would have enough time to hide whatever it is she was doing that she probably shouldn’t be doing. Sure enough, when she stopped in front of Catra’s cell, she saw the other woman sitting up on her bed in one of her “definitely not doing anything” poses, fourth lollipop of the day in her mouth. 

“Man, you really love lollipops huh?” Adora said, opening the cell door and stepping in, much less careful with the keys now than she was when she first did this.

“There are so many flavors! I didn’t know this many even existed.”

“I know right? Have you tried cherry?”

“I LOVE CHERRY. I could eat cherry flavored things for the rest of my life.”

“Agreed,” Adora said wholeheartedly, before sighing and slumping down against the wall. She wanted the conversation to stay like this all night, but she knew that it would get her nowhere. Gritting her teeth, she took the jump.

“Are you Ok Catra?”

“Huh? Yeah, I haven’t swallowed any more lollipop sticks. I learned THAT lesson about laying down with food in your mouth the hard way.” 

“No, not that. Are you feeling Ok?”

“What? Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

Gods no wonder she hadn’t seen it. Catra was still so good at putting on that mask. But now that she was looking for it, it was all right there. The eyes darting along the mortar of the bricks like chasing a rat through a maze. The shift on the bed, sitting on one of her hands now. Scraping two of her claws together. She was hiding something. 

“Glimmer said you’ve been acting strange.”

“Glimmer?” Catra snorted and jumped on the chance to shut down the conversation. “Come on, what does she know about me?”

“Exactly. Glimmer’s barely seen you as a non-enemy for over three hours total, so why bother putting on the mask for her? But you’d be surprised. She’s very perceptive and empathetic once you get past the anger.” Adora looked out through the bars, recalling the first time she had met Glimmer. “And I think I agree with her. I think you’re not Ok.”

Catra scowled and looked off to the side. “Yeah well, what does it matter anyway?”

“Your wellbeing matters to us Catra. To all of us, despite what history says. Even if not me and the others, you can’t deny Entrapta and Scorpia care.”

God dammit Catra really couldn’t. “Well it’s not like I get to see them that often anyway.”

“Come on, we both know they sneak down here and visit you when they’re not supposed to.”

“What? How did you know that? Are there cameras down here?” Catra frantically began examining the corners of her cell. She thought she had this room memorized inside out by now, but did she miss something? Who knows what weird magic stuff Bright Moon had.

“No, Catra. I caught them.”

“Oh.”

“On multiple occasions.” Adora held up her hands, counting on her fingers. “I would say at least… six? Six times?”

“Oh my gods.” Catra pinched the bridge of her nose. “How did I ever get so much done with those two.”

“To be fair, what they lack in stealth they make up for in other areas. I’m pretty sure I saw Scorpia cut one of those steel cables they use for big bridges the other day like it was nothing. And Entrapta speaks for herself.”

“True.”

“I’m pretty sure I saw Emily talking to Sea Hawk’s boat the other day.”

“Really? That thing is alive?”

Adora shuddered. “I sure hope not. The number of times he’s set it on fire alone would make a convincing abuse case.”

As the conversation lapsed into silence, Adora mentally cursed herself. She said she would get right to the point, but she let Catra lead her off on a tangent anyway.

“Ok, the point is everyone here wants to help you.”

“Really?” Catra cut in, gesturing to her “room”.

“Ok well, you still have to answer for your past actions. But no one’s come down here and mocked you. Remember when they did that in the Horde? They’d spit on the prisoners, or worse?” Catra stayed silent, but she knew Adora was right. “Tell me what’s wrong. Please?” Catra sighed at that, knowing she had lost. Talking about Scorpia and Entrapta had caught her off guard and sapped all of the energy she had prepared for denial. She had forgotten how devious Adora could be when she wanted to. 

“It’s just...why bother keeping me around?”

“Huh?”

“The Horde will change all their strategy again, and I won’t have a magic sword to keep me useful. They’ll just trash me.”

“The Rebels don’t do that.”

“Oh yeah? How do you know that?” Catra said, whirling on Adora. “What reason would they have to keep me? Why wouldn’t they throw me away WHEN I’M WORTHLESS!” Catra shouted at Adora, ignoring the tears pooling in the corners of her eyes. But she couldn’t ignore it when Adora threw her arms around her and pulled them together. And if Catra maybe wrapped her arms tight around Adora too, and wiped her eyes on Adora’s shoulder a few times, well that was just incidental. When Catra finally regained her composure (cried herself dry), Adora gently pushed her to arm’s length and Catra saw some of that old fire in her eyes. The fire that said Adora was five more minutes away from throwing down with God, and it would be a lie if Catra didn’t find it immensely comforting. 

“Why don’t we find out?”

“Huh?”

“Come on.” Adora said, standing up and hauling Catra to her feet. Turning to the cell door, hand still holding Catra’s in a vice grip, Adora began walking them through the castle. 

“Uh, Adora? Where are we going? It’s like…” Catra eyed a passing window. “11 at night? 11:30?” She didn’t get an answer, but honestly, she wasn’t too worried. She was pretty sure Adora, being She-Ra on occasion, had one of the highest-ranking positions in the castle. Second only to-

“Your Majesty!” Adora called, throwing open an intricately engraved door.

Oh fuck.

“Wha? Adora. What are you doing here? With Catra?” The Queen slurred as she rose from her bed, rubbing her eyes. It seemed even the impeccable Queen of Bright Moon couldn’t shake off sleep in an instant.

“What happens to us after the war ends?”

“Not actually my question, but that works too.” Catra muttered to herself. 

“I, what?” the Queen asked, some of the clarity beginning to return to her eyes.

“After the war is over, what happens to ex-Horde like me and Catra?” 

“Well, as She-Ra you will of course be-”

“I won’t be She-Ra any more.”

“What?” Catra and Angella both asked, the former turning to Adora with her jaw hanging open. 

“She-Ra is needed to restore balance. Not maintain it. That,” she gave the Queen an intense look that actually seemed to humble her for a moment “will be up to you and the rest of the Alliance. After the war is over, I’m hanging up the Sword of Protection. So, what will happen to us when we have nothing else to give the kingdom?”

This was much closer to Catra’s question, and she perked her ears and listened intently to the answer. 

“Well, as irreplaceable members of the war effort you’ll be given living accommodations for a set period of time and an unmatched recommendation for a job of your choosing.”

“Wait, really?” Catra blurted, too shocked to stop herself. “Just, live our life? Even if the war is still going on? No...getting fired?”

“Lord no.” the Queen answered quickly. “Getting fired like that doesn’t happen here. It is another term for losing your job, but not your life. Of course, the length of time you spend helping the Rebellion will have an effect on your repayment. But if you wanted to right now, or in Catra’s case immediately after her time was served, you could walk out the castle doors and never come back and no one would stop you.” She finished her speech, and saw the two girls had to wrap their head around this new info. Even Adora, who had been living in Bright Moon for a while now. Seemed thrown for a loop. Wanting to do her best to assuage their fears, she added “And for the record, the Rebellion will always have use for more people, regardless of what their role is.” Angella leveled a heavy look at Catra who, despite her bravado, suddenly felt very small. 

“Ok. Good.” Adora said, and Catra could hear the momentum draining fast in her voice. Turning to look, she could see the confusion, like she had been given a new puzzle that she had to examine from all sides before she could begin to solve it. Catra imagined the same look was on her face. 

“Excellent. Now I’d recommend you both get some sleep. We have another busy day tomorrow.” Angella stated, and her tone of voice made it clear that that was the end of the conversation. 

“Right.” Adora forced out, back to her usual not-reckless self. Or maybe, putting on her usual-self-mask. “Thank you for your time, your Majesty. Good night.” She grabbed Catra’s wrist and dragged her out of the room, the latter only had enough time to throw a quick “Night!” over her shoulder before the door shut behind them.

 

-   
  


Catra was still processing all this new information when the familiar sound of shiny teleportation interrupted her thoughts. Turning to her left, all she had the energy for was a sigh and “Yeah?” when she saw Glimmer standing there with an unreadable expression. 

“I just have one question.”

“Alright.”

“If you could go back, would you forget her?”

“What? What does that mean?”

“Come on, like you don’t know.” Glimmer walked over and dropped down onto the bed next to her. It occured to Catra that this was the closest the two of them have been since she had defected. Since they had become allies. “If you could go back in time, and make it so that you had never met her, would you?” 

Catra looked down at the floor and contemplated all the snark she could spit back. She could see it all play out in her head. Snappy one liner, caustic reply, angry teleport away, hollow victory. In the end though, her mouth betrayed her, and all she could say was the truth.

“Of course not.”

The tension she was holding fell out of Glimmer like water down stones. “Yeah, she has that effect on people, huh?”

Silence.

“I heard you stormed in on my mom.”

“Well, I didn’t do most of the stroming. And the storm didn’t last long.”

“Yeah, she can do that to you. Still, her face must have been hilarious.”

“Really? Why?” Catra asked, thinking back. The Queen’s face had seemed pretty normal. A little shocked, but that was to be expected when you practically kick down someone’s door. Mostly cool and stern. Very regal.

“You know my mother sleeps without any clothes right?”

“WHAT?” Catra shrieked, her head whipping around to Glimmer. Oh gods she was in for it now. There was no way she wasn’t being executed at dawn. “Wait, how do you know that?”

“Let’s just say there’s a reason I don’t teleport directly into her room anymore.”

“Shit.” Was all Catra could say. The closest thing she could imagine was seeing Shadow Weaver-no nope. Stopping that one right there.

“Yeah. Presuming my mom doesn’t hold it against you, which she probably won’t unless you have the same traumatic memories I have, they’re moving you tomorrow.”

“So that’s why she had the blanket up to her chin the whole time”

“Yeah you’re good. You’re gonna get  an actual room. Not a, you know.” She said, gesturing to the walls around her. “That is, if you want to.”

“Why wouldn’t I want to get out of here?”

“You’d have to wear a tracking stone.”

“Ah.”

“Yeah. Normally it comes in a collar, but everyone figured that might be a little” quick glance “insensitive. You can have it as a collar, bracelet, or anklet.”

“I appreciate the options. Will it look nice?”

“Probably not. It’s going to be plain iron, and the stone is a kinda shiny blue.”

“Blue doesn’t really fit with my color scheme.”

“I know. But it’s part of the magic. Can’t really change it.”

“Gods, everything around here is so pastel!” Catra shouted, and fell back onto her mattress with a huff. “First thing I’m gonna do is find a bucket of black paint and go wild on these walls.”

“I definitely didn’t just hear you say that.”

“Thanks. So how does this tracker work?”

“During the day, you’ll have unsupervised access to pretty much the whole castle, excluding certain rooms. Armory. Shield Focus Stones. Stuff like that.”

“Fair enough.”

“10:30 PM to 8 AM though you have curfew. Your room, and your room only.”

“Man, 10:30? Really.?”

“I know. I know. But trust me, my mom wanted to have it be 9. The rest of us had to fight her up to 10:30.”

“Really?” 

“Yeah. As someone who has had the 9 o’clock curfew, I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.”

And just like that all the heat was sucked out of the room. The two shot each other looks that had whole paragraphs of half-trusts and uncertainty, but neither was ready to read it all out. 

Not yet at least.

“Well, just thought I’d come give you a heads up. So you could pack up your diary and, I don’t know, eat that pencil I definitely don’t know about.”

“Hey!”

Glimmer just laughed to herself as she stood up and prepared for the long-range teleport back to her room. 

“Hey Glimmer?”

Glimmer turned to Catra, but she was facing the wall, away from her. “Yeah?”

“...Thank you.”

Smiling to herself, Glimmer answered “Any time Hairball.”

Catra whirled around, her mouth half open with a retort, but Glimmer was already gone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks dorkyduckling for beta-ing this chapter!


	5. Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One door closes, another opens.

Catra stretched her arms above her head, still shaking off sleep as she padded out to the kitchen. Grabbing an apple out of the bowl and a bagel out of the container, she sat down at the table to eat as she waited for Adora to wake up. Over the years, Adora fully embraced the civilian sleep schedule, staying up late and rising at the last possible second she could get away with. Catra, on the other hand, couldn’t seem to break the habit, getting to sleep early (relatively speaking), and rising at the crack of dawn. Today, however, Adora wouldn’t be behind her long. 

Something heavy and human-shaped flopped onto Catra’s upper back and head, and Catra sighed around her apple. “You can’t do this every morning Adora.”

“I absolutely can,” Adora responded, muffled by Catra’s hair. “You’re just too comfy. I can’t not.” She enunciated her point with a loud, overly exaggerated snore. 

“You’d better not get drool in my hair.”

“You’re never gonna let me live that down are you?” Adora asked, propping her elbows on Catra’s shoulders and resting her head on top of Catra’s so her voice would be clearer.

“Not on either of our lives.”

“Well, if you want to bring up things we never live down-”

“You better not.”

“-remember the time I first did this? Because my shoulder still does.”

Catra vividly recalled the first time Adora had hugged her from behind. She also vividly remembered grabbing Adora’s arms and flipping her over her back and slamming her down onto the table in front of her. Everyone but Adora (including Catra) was mortified, Adora was very impressed, and needed three stitches where she landed on a fork. Hugs were far less common in the Fright Zone compared to judo holds.

“Alright alright, truce.” Catra conceded, grabbing another apple and tossing it behind her to Adora, who caught it and took a bite. “We’ve both done things that will live on in infamy. Hurry up and get eating, I don’t want to be late.”

“I still can’t believe Catra, Queen of Being a Moderate Annoyance to Authority, is so dead-set on showing up to work on time.”    
“Well, I’m sorry if I don’t want to get on the IMMORTAL QUEEN’S BAD SIDE. She can hold a grudge literally forever if she wanted to.”

“You know she wouldn’t do that.”

“I’d rather not give her the chance.” Catra took the last bite of her bagel and stood up. “I’m going to shower.”

“You know if you really want to save time…”

“Not gonna happen.” 

“Aw, why not?” Adora said, following Catra to their bedroom door.

“Because a) when we shower together it takes WAY longer than if we were separated.” 

“Yeah, it does.”

“And b),” Catra continued, throwing a pair of socks at Adora’s head for the comment “I got more than enough of that when we were still living in the castle. Finish your breakfast.” Catra said as she gently nudged Adora back toward the kitchen. “Besides, don’t forget.” Catra purred, suddenly pressed against Adora’s back, her lips centimeters away from her ear. “If you’re good today, you get a reward tonight.”

Adora spun around to respond, but the water was already running in the bathroom. 

 

-

 

Adora was just finalizing the attack plan for the next month when Bow came racing into her office. Adora was up in a flash, sword drawn. “Bow! What is it, what’s wrong?”

Bow, leaning against the doorframe panting, wheezed out “We...we found it.”

“You found…” Adora started, confused, before realization hit her. “You found it?”

Bow only nodded, just beginning to catch his breath.

“Come on!” Adora said, racing over to the door. She wrapped an arm under Bow’s and pulled him upright. “We have to go tell-”

“Catra?” a voice said behind her. Turning around to the hallway, Catra was already there, strapping on the last piece of her armor, Glimmer’s hand still on her shoulder. “Glimmer already got me.” 

Glimmer was looking at Bow, shocked. “How did you get here before me?” 

“Ran. Hard.”

“No kidding.” Glimmer muttered to herself. Louder, to the group, she said “Ready guys?” The other three answered by putting their hands on her shoulders with determination bright in their eyes. 

“Let’s end this war.”

 

Adora defecting had been a heavy blow to the Horde, but Catra’s defection had been what ultimately brought it down. With the loss of two unmatched Force Captains, the Horde began to lose steam and ground. Eventually, Hordak was forced to switch tactics. He abandoned the Fright Zone with a small force of his most trusted in the middle of the night and left it to fall just days later. Queen Scorpia reclaimed it as her own and, with the help of Perfuma and Mermista, had been undoing the years of environmental damage caused. But Hordak was still out there, moving his camp every few days and performing guerilla strikes when they could. They had discovered the camp one other time, but after taking the time to decide on a battle plan, they returned to find it abandoned. The Bright Moon Generals knew that if they were going to take it this time, they would have to hit it fast and hard.

 

The door didn’t stand a chance as She-Ra kicked it in. The hinges broke and the door actually sailed into the room. Hordak fired a laser blast through the doorway, but it refracted harmlessly off She-Ra’s shield. Bow ducked out and fired an arrow right down the barrel of the blaster, ripping it out of Hordak’s hand and pinning it to the wall behind him. The threat disarmed, the four spread out across the room, all with weapons trained on the enemy. She-Ra returned her shield to it’s original form and leveled the blade at Hordak. 

“Surender Hordak. You aren’t going to win this battle. It’s over.” 

Hordak looked around the room and saw he was surrounded. Over his earpiece, he could hear his soldiers dying at the hands of the Princess Alliance’s army. 

“If only I knew how much of a pain you two would be,” Hordak responded, speaking only to Catra and Adora. “I would have had you executed a long time ago.”

“My only regret is that I didn’t cause you more.” Catra spat back, claws glinting in the light. Adora remained silent.

Hordak only spat at her feet. “You’re right, it is over.” Hordak moved fast, too fast for anyone to react as he pulled a small blaster concealed in his sleeve and put it under his own chin. 

 

-

 

Catra felt a sense of  dé jà vu so strong she nearly lost her balance as she escorted the last imprisoned guard to his cell. Her cell, all those years ago. But she managed to keep it together as she locked him in and walked back down the hallway. When she reached the top of the stairs, however, her legs suddenly gave out and she fell forward. Thankfully, Adora Glimmer and Bow were there to catch her. Adora gave Glimmer and Bow a quick nod, and they left to go handle one of the hundred other things that ending a war brought up. After they turned the corner and were out of sight and earshot, Catra let the pieces of her shell fall apart as she wept into Adora’s shoulder. Adora rubbed her back and whispered reassuring words into Catra’s hair, her own tears falling silently next to them. 

 

Of course, there was more than just crying to do. The war was over! After all was said and done, the Queen declared the remainder of the week a national holiday, and the party raged just as long. There were even some rumors that the Queen herself let her iron-clad self-control slip during the party, and did a few juvenile things that would follow her for decades to come. Some said there were even pictures.

But those were just rumors.

 

-

 

“Are you sure about this?” Catra asked, one hand wrapped around the skiff’s pole to keep her balance. These things weren’t meant for four.

“I am.” Adora answered, the Sword of Protection heavy in her hands. “I meant what I said all those years ago.”

“You said you would hang it up, not get rid of it.” Catra pointed out.

“Same idea.” Adora shifted her gaze out to the Whispering Woods, now stretching out as far as the eye could see. “If I need it again, then it will find me again. Who knows,” she said, turning to the other three. “Maybe it will pick one of you.”

“Ugh, pass.” Catra said, “No way I would wear that skirt thing.”

“Same.” Glimmer agreed. The three women turned to Bow.

“What?”

“I think Bow would make a good She-Ra.”

“Definitely.”

“Agreed.”

“Guuuys.” Bow said, turning his head away to hide his blush.

The three shared a smile before Adora turned back the the woods. Taking a deep breath, she wound back and threw the sword as hard as she could. Watching it spin off into the distance until it disappeared into the foliage. Exhaling, she felt as though someone had taken the weight of the world off her shoulders. Turning to the others, she grinned to them. “Let’s go home.”

 

-

 

“So what now?” Catra asked as she wrapped her arm around Adora’s waist and laid her head over the other woman’s heart.

“...bedtime?” Adora answered, folding the covers over the two of them.

“No you goof.” Catra laughed. “I mean, what do we do now? This war has been our whole lives. Literally. What do we do now that’s it’s over?”

“I don’t know. That elementary school in town said they needed a new teacher. I thought I might look into that.” 

“Really? You, with a bunch of little munchkins underfoot? That’s…” Catra swallowed thickly as a semi-related image formed in her mind against her will. Pushing the thought to the side for later, she continued “That’s actually not that hard to believe.”

“Aw. Thank you.”

Silence for a while. Not uncomfortable, but hollow. Out of place.

“You’re worried about what you’ll do?”

“Yeah.” 

“Don’t worry.” Adora cupped Catra’s face. “We have the rest of our lives to find out.”

Adora learned the hard way that Catra didn’t brush her teeth that night, and Catra learned the hard way what their new pillow felt like when they hit her in the face. It would not be the last things they learned the hard way, but it was the end of a hard part of their lives.

They had never been so free. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, this is it. The end end. No more chapters. Thank you all for reading and your wonderful feedback.


End file.
